My Grams...

This one's about one of the most loved person from my life...my Grams...my Nana Papa...

Well the gentleman in the picture is not him....he just reminds me of him and thus this post. Its been almost nine years since he passed away but his memories are etched in my heart forever. And thus, when few months back I happen to see this elderly gentleman at Gurudwara Shri Bangla Sahib, I saw my Grams in him.

I have this habit of visiting the Gurudwara in the wee hours of the morning post work. The freshly cooked, hot and piping Kada Prashad is the culprit behind this timing and also the fact that the calm of the early morning is very endearing.

I don't remember when was the first time I saw him walking softly inside the main arena to pay his respect. His slow gait, white flowing beard and the optimism to go through this morning ritual tugged at my heart and brought a smile to my face. I practically saw my Grams walking in front me. I thought - " He would have looked just the same had he been there today".

Over the months, everytime I visited the Gurudwara, he would always be there and his gait kept getting slower with each visit. I used to look forward to this rare sighting. The last time I saw him was in second week of November 2015. It was visiting the Gurudwara after a long break and wasn't sure I would get to see him. I paid my respects and I was just starting to head back home when I saw this frail figure walk up the stairs and slowly walk towards the main arena. It was him....

He had grown very frail and took more than 30 seconds to take each step. For the first time in all these months I saw a family member accompany him. I felt happy to see him yet there was something that made me sad...his health was on the downslide and it was very visible. I stopped in my track and stayed back to see some more of him. It took him a long time to enter the Gurudwara and pay his respects.

I went back wondering when would I get to see him next. Another month went by and soon approached December 29 - my Gram's birthday. Every year, I try to visit Gurudwara on his birthday and thus I was back at my source of solace on a chilling winter morning. I waited for a long time, hoping to catch a glimpse of my Gram's reflection but alas... he did not turn up till the time I was there.

I went back with an anxiety about his well being. May be it was too cold and so he did not come; maybe I reached there too early and he would have come later; maybe he was out of station.... All these thoughts started clouding my mind.  

Time went by & I rang in the New Year, enjoyed my birthday, celebrated my darling doll's birthday, took a nice and lazy annual leave and today I am all geared up to join office for the first time in 2016. I don't know when would I be going back to the Gurudwara but everyday I hope and pray, that whenever I go next, I find him there.... my Gram's reflection...

Wishing health and happiness for him... God Bless...